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How to create a beautiful self care routine for yourself

self care routine

Well, it’s been a while since I sat down and wrote an actual post so it feels good to be back. The reason I took a few months off from writing and being active on social media – besides changing the website and creating a new freebie, which you can get here – has been due to something that I will write about today, and that is why having a self care routine is important.

See, for months I have struggled with knowing what really makes me happy and what I really want to spend the rest of my life doing, so by the time autumn arrived, I felt pretty awful and spent and it was only natural for me to take some time away from writing and truly look inside to find the answers.

Going through my self care routine every day has been the most important thing I had done in the past two months. I went through a bit of a middle twenties crisis if I may call it like that, because I listened to everyone else for the majority of my life and now it hit me back, you see. It hit me back in a way that hurt the most – by taking away my passion for writing. As I am writing this, I feel a bit foreign to typing and thinking about what the next sentence will be – although it is not really me who is putting this post together, as something inside my brain happens to be aware of what I will do next more than I am – but nonetheless I need to write this and get back on the road.

I wrote about creating a self care routine before and it is something that is very dear to my heart, but I want to explore more of it and I want to go deeper, because I firmly believe that vegans are not doing enough on this front and must create a self care routine as fast as they can, otherwise it could cost them their health and we all know how precious our health is.

  • Your self care routine should consist of things that are good for you, of things that make you happy and fulfil you. Forget about gossip magazines and comparing your body to the body of an Insta model; I am talking about taking a bath with bubbles and a good book, I am talking about a refreshing walk among the trees and flowers and streams; I am talking about laughing out loud with friends who appreciate your company and do not fill your head with lies and unkind words.
  • Your self care routine should move you in the direction of peace and relaxation. It should take away the burdens you have carried with you throughout the day and give you a place to breathe and recharge.
  • Your self care routine should not depend on money, time, or people around you. It should be free, timeless, and it should be able to be done even when the world is going mad and the media is screaming out loud. It should be a part of you, something that no one and nothing can remove or dictate.

Your self care routine can take up to three hours or it can last for five minutes, that is absolutely up to you, but one thing should be clear – it must be done daily.

I can tell you that taking time for myself in the past two months has been absolutely crucial for my mental health. I have been questioning my ability to stand in truth when lies are being spat out by someone else;  I have been questioning my willingness to sacrifice a peaceful future for a future of change, because no, in my case they cannot be done hand in hand; I have been questioning the person I thought I was.

While I was going through my middle twenties crisis – which was absolutely needed and not even that hard as I perhaps make it to be – I had a constant self care routine that I practiced every day. It consisted of three things:

  • Journaling in my diary.
  • Facing at least one fear every day and denying it its presence.
  • Taking responsibility for my actions.

I filled 365 pages in three weeks. Yes, three weeks of constant writing about what I was thinking about – and let me tell you, a lot of emotions went out just as easily as they came in, simply because once I wrote them down I was able to let rotten feelings towards certain people go. I think that might just be the answer to getting over a break up, which I will try as soon as I, you know, break up with someone.

(p.s. – when I say that I lost my passion for writing, I mean writing for my website. Journaling was more about putting my thoughts on paper and not about writing for the sake of writing.)

Every day I took at least one fear and looked it in the eye. I questioned it and observed it and questioned it even more. And then I did exactly what I was afraid of. From being completely honest with my dad about how I feel, to leaving delusional people behind me and e-mailing a billionaire on his personal email about my awesome business idea (no, it was not Elon Musk and yes, the idea is completely crazy and if my mind doesn’t intervene, you will know what it is in the near future). I ignored the fear and did what I had to do in that moment, and then I didn’t look back but just kept on moving forward.

Taking responsibility for ones actions perhaps doesn’t sound as an act of love or something to put on a self care schedule, but it’s totally what I did. I took responsibility and removed fake-ass people from my life; I took responsibility and took my role as an aunt more seriously; I took responsibility and became a better mother to Chuck (our dog); I took responsibility and didn’t write when I knew that I wouldn’t write from a place of love and compassion. I took responsibility for how my life looked and there is no better act of self care as is that of being in charge of your own life.

I already offered a few self care ideas in my previous post that you can read here, but I promise that this is the topic I will talk about much more in the future.

Until then, can you take a minute and let me know in the comments what your self care routine looks like? How do you relax and connect with peace inside of you? Can you share any beautiful resources that are all about self care? I would absolutely love to know, lovely.

As always, if you find yourself wanting more and are interested in following what I do, make sure to find me on Instagram, Twitter and Pinterest.

Tanja

self care routine

How to handle haters as a vegan blogger

how to handle haters

This is a chapter from my eBook Vegans on The Net: How to Set Up a Blog That Teaches And Inspires People to Go Vegan.

I have talked about being nice and respectful towards people on your blog and social media, but still… what to do when you have a troll that bullies you? The easiest way to get rid of them is to ignore them.

Seriously, if you do not want online haters, why are you on the internet anyway? There will always be haters that will provoke you and write nasty things to you. That’s just how things are on the internet; it’s not realistic to think that all people will be nice to you.

In my first eBook, Vegan Convo, I have written an entire chapter on how to handle people that provoke and bully you on the internet. I truly recommend you read it, but I will still share with you a few ways on how to handle online haters.

I assume you are still with me on the idea of non violence and kindness for all, but let’s face it – sometimes you really wish you could grab someone through the computer screen and slap them with the truth. But… that wouldn’t really do much for the vegan movement that is supposed to be all about compassion and love.

You are not obliged to respond and the best way is always to ignore and focus on the good comments, but since we are all different and sometimes we just really want to say at least something to address nasty comments, I have picked a few ways on how to respond kindly.

That’s why I have some great responses that you can use in case of online trolls.

  • Hater: Bacon. You: (we don’t respond to those people).
  • Hater: Pigs taste good. You: So does compassion.
  • Hater: You: I love bitches too! I always loved how great mothers’ dogs are.
  • Hater: I need my protein. You: Me too, that’s why I love green leafy veggies. Don’t you just love beans? So delicious.
  • Hater: You: You meant to say sloth? I love them as well.
  • Hater: The food chain tho. You: I know right, I love how bears that kill humans can just continue with their lives. Not.
  • Hater: Lions kill. You: They also lick their bum, but we don’t want to see you do that, don’t we?
  • Hater: Murderer, what about ants that you kill. You: I do my best not to; do you do your best to avoid killing animals too?
  • Hater: God said we can eat animals. You: Perhaps, but I will wait for him to tell me that in person and not through a book written by humans.
  • Hater: You only live once. You: That’s why I do my best to live a life that is good to my fellow beings.
  • Hater: Cows are stupid. You: Its humans that drink other species milk tough.
  • Hater: I have canines for a reason. You: The reason being that you can eat burnt toast and not rotten flesh.
  • Hater: We are animals too. You: Another reason why we should strive for equality among all animals, don’t you agree?
  • Hater: Meanwhile, children are abused and you don’t even care. You: My heart is big enough to care for animals and humans, how about yours?

Obviously, they are meant to be witty and funny, not offensive or rude. I hope you found them helpful and will use them in case of need.

It’s all about love, my friend. Don’t show them that are you offended, hurt or angry; make a witty comeback, ignore or simply reply with a heart emoji. Show them love and trust that deep down they know what an asshole they are being to you, and that what they are doing is not correct.

Get my eBook Vegans on The Net: How to Set Up a Blog That Teaches And Inspires People to Go Vegan here.

How to talk to kids about veganism?

how to talk to kids

This is a chapter from my eBook Vegan Convo: Talking about veganism with people who eat animals.

Kids can be very compassionate beings if we let them, but usually we condition them from the early age to eat animals and abuse them for fun. We take children with us to hunt and kill; we go fishing with them and tell them that eating animals is okay because their bodies are meant for our consumption.

They watch us kill bugs and insects, talk about killing and dominating the animals, we take them to Zoos and aquariums with an excuse to teach them about the animals and how they live. But in reality we are doing the opposite; we are taking them as far away from the real lives of animals as possible.

Animals in nature don’t live in cages and eat food that is given to them, they run and hunt, they take care of themselves, but we don’t know that because Zoos are prisons for animals. Animals there are locked in cages and put on display for our pleasure and entertainment. They are taken from the wild and put in cages FOR us and BY us, not for their good, but for OUR good.

If you watch children with a pear and a worm, in most cases they will eat a pear and play with a worm. They might harm it, but it’s because they are not careful enough, not because they would want to kill an animal. Sure there are kids that would kill a spider, but not because they would want to (usually not, but hey, there is always that one in a million chance that someone is born a psychopath), but because they have been told that it’s acceptable to kill an animal that is different from us.

A child doesn’t want to kill a pig or a chicken; they could never take a knife and stab an animal. It is not natural for us; we are not born with an instinct to kill someone. Tigers and lions are born with an urge to kill, but it’s because they are tigers and lions, not humans that grow salad on their garden and cook meat before we eat it. If it would be natural for us to eat an animal we wouldn’t have to grill it, we would just eat it with bones and blood all together.

A newborn baby is not craving blood and flesh of other animals, they crave their mother’s milk, which is also what baby calves drink to grow, their mother cow’s milk. Have you ever seen a grown cow drinking milk from another cow? I know you haven’t, it’s not possible and it’s not natural. Yet, here we are humans, drinking milk from a cow as adults. Not really something that is written in our DNA isn’t it? It’s something we have taught ourselves to do, we have forced change upon our DNA and our bodies, and we changed who humans were supposed to be.

Sounds like something humans would do? Yeah, I thought so.

Now, there might be children that grow up in a vegan family and they find themselves having no compassion at all towards animals, it happens. Just like it happens that a sociopath or a psychopath grows up in a completely functional and loving family. But what are the chances of something like that happening? One in a million, if even that.

If you find yourself in a child’s company and they are eating an animal, you can share with them a fun fact about an animal they are eating. My sister is not a vegan and she raises her daughter to eat animals, but whenever we are together I always make sure that she is told that pigs are very intelligent and clean animals. My sister always makes fun of me for saying that, because I always say it to her when she insults someone that they are dirty like a pig. She usually says that she just wanted to see my reaction and that’s why she said it.

Kids observe adults and learn from them, so be someone that is compassionate and kind. If their parents are not a great example of someone who is compassionate and loving towards animals, make sure that you are. You can be an example of someone who treats animals with respect and love, you can always inspire someone else to go vegan as well. Those kids might not be vegan growing up, but when they are old enough to buy food for themselves they will remember their aunt or uncle that cared for animals so much.

Children are our future and we need to make sure that we help them grow up to be compassionate and incredible people, and the only way to make sure that this happens is to be an example of a compassionate and incredible person. When they are young they are still unaware of how horrible the world can be and unlike adults, the world hasn’t corrupted them… much. We know that these days’ kids grow up very fast, well, let’s make sure they grow up fast to be good people and not lost people. Technology is good, but what is better is caring for others, so let’s care for each other and the children will learn.

EXERCISE TIME.

Borrow in a library a bunch of vegan friendly children’s books and give them to a child you know. You can also take them to a farm sanctuary or a similar place and in the mean time you can talk to them about animals and how we must be nice to them. Be a positive example of a vegan.

BONUS TIPS FOR VEGAN PARENTS WITH NON VEGAN KIDS.

  • Watch vegan movies with them. Okja is a great example of a beautiful yet powerful movie that shows the cruel side of eating meat. Yes, it is kid friendly and will not show anything graphic that would give them nightmares. It’s not a completely vegan movie but the main message is pretty clear. You can also watch Babe and Legally Blonde 2, which talks about animal testing.
  • Take them to a farm sanctuary and let them connect to the animals that were rescued. If they never see pigs in person, and if they never touch a cow, how on Earth can they feel love for them and care enough to stop eating them? Sometimes people just need to touch an animal to connect the dots.
  • Buy vegan friendly books for them. Ruby Roth is an incredible children’s book writer and has written beautiful vegan books. They are easy to read and perfect for a child of any age really. I already have one that I am saving for my niece when she is a bit older.
  • Veganize your kid’s favourite foods. Vegan hot dogs? Got it. Vegan pancakes? Got it. You can make pretty much anything vegan these days.
  • Buy vegan foods for them. You know, like soy yoghurt and vegan candy. There are plenty of those, so trust me that you will find something your kid will like.
  • Sit them down and have a talk. It’s important to let your kids know that what they’re doing is not good and that you wish you could teach them about it earlier – in case you just went vegan because otherwise why wouldn’t you raise your kids vegan as well – but that you know better now and you want to let them know that you will be eating vegan at home because you love the animals and eating plants is healthier.
  • Show them mild graphic videos. Yes, there are graphic videos that even kids can watch.

Get Vegan Convo: Talking About Veganism with People Who Eat Animals here.