Let’s look at something that can either hold us back or lift us higher – people in our lives.
Without a doubt, we all have people in our lives that are toxic and destructive. We have all dealt with being trapped in a negative zone with them or had them suck all the energy from us. To remove toxic people from your life is to open the space for light and love to enter.
I know it can be difficult if those toxic people are living with you and you cannot ignore them for weeks, but there are tricks that you can use to still not get triggered by them and live a life that is free from negativity and poison.
Before we begin, I do want to get two things straight:
- It is OKAY to avoid people who make you feel like shit. It is OKAY to ignore people that possess the energy that makes you feel weak or upset. It is OKAY to take care of yourself and remove yourself from that shared life you once had with a certain person.
- If you think that all of that could be solved by just talking to the person, instead of going to the extremes and avoiding certain places, you are obviously very privileged in a sense that you do not have very toxic people in your life. Or you are one of them.
How to remove toxic people from your life in case they live with you? Or you have to see them every day (work, school etc.).
- Find something to keep your mind occupied during the time you spend with them. Focus on a book, work, learning, cleaning, gardening… you get my point. Focus on something that will help you forget – even if only for a few minutes – that you are surrounded by people who you don’t want to be around.
- Ignore them and train yourself to not even see them. Instead of focusing on something else, this time try to simply be in the moment and with you, not 2 metres away with them. Meditation can help with that, as you will be calmer and won’t even notice they are near you. This may take a bit longer to master, but at one point, I do believe we can be able to simply look past them and not even notice them.
- Find something good in them. Can you learn something from them? Can you practice acceptance? Perhaps, you can look at it as a challenge or a test for your future. I like to think of it as a test for my future company. If I can learn how to handle 3 people now, I will have an easier time handling a bit more people, when I will have a company full of them.
Of course, there is always the option of talking to them and telling them that you wish to not talk to them, and that could mean they will respect your wish and will leave you alone. But let’s not hold our breath.
And what about people who you see only on special occasions? How to remove toxic people from your life when you don’t see them often? That is much easier, of course, but there are still things you can do.
- I find ignoring works best. Although I am afraid ignoring is seen as something mean or rude, I don’t agree with that so I will recommend it anyway. Stop answering your phone, stop replying to texts and emails, avoid places where you could be seen by them. If the person doesn’t get the memo once you stop answering their calls, you will have to avoid places where they could see you. After a while, they will forget about you and you can go back to normal.
- Remove them from your life – completely. That means unfriending them on Facebook, unfollowing them on Twitter, deleting their number, perhaps even blocking them if you don’t want them to search for you and send any friends requests. Mark their email as spam and completely cut all ties, because to remove toxic people from your life also means removing everything that could remind you of them. Sometimes just hearing their name can trigger your memories and you can find yourself feeling uncomfortable.
Now that we wrote down a few ideas on what we can do to remove toxic people from our lives, let’s look at who toxic people even are. What do they do?
- Insult you.
- Use you.
- Abuse you.
- Harass you.
- Hold you back from being your best version.
- Do not accept you for who you are.
- Make fun of you.
- And so much more.
Toxic people are those humans who do not know where the line is; people who will keep you from growing and push you down.
What about you? Do you have any toxic people in your life? How are you dealing with them? Do you have any tips on how to remove them from our lives? Let me know in the comment section.
As always, if you have a minute or two, find me on Instagram.
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